I thought it was because Ai-Vy was sick and congested that she cried non-stop and I had to hold her all day and all night, but she's been doing that even though she's all better. I am so busy with her that I am behind on everything else and it's getting overwhelming. I feel like I am trying so hard just to stay afloat but am not suceeding. At times I am so overwhelmed I feel like I am drowning and want to cry. I have 3 load of laundry that needs to be folded and are still on the couch. Our laundry is also pilng up and need to be washed. My coupons hasn't been clipped since the end of September and it saddens me. I have a huge stack on my desk and I am not sure when I will be able to get to it. Let's not even talk about chores and cooking. Thank goodness we have cleaners who come to help me keep my sanity. I've been barely able to keep up with my blog let alone keep up with anyone else's. I feel so bad that I haven't been able to read anyone else's blog and keep up with their lives. If you are reading this, sorry gals!
I haven't been able to spend much time with Ky-An either and I miss him so much. He wakes up at 6 in the morning and Hieu quickly scoop him out of the room so he won't wake-up Ai-Vy. I am too tired to go out to play with him so I went back to sleep with Ai-Vy. He left for the babysitter at 7a.m. and Ai-Vy wakes up at about 7:30a.m. She then fuss for the whole day and when I got her to sleep, she pops right back up as soon as I put her down. She cry so I feed her, then she cry in the middle of feeding so I burp her, still cries so I change her diaper, cry again so I feed her some more, cry again and I just put her to sleep. I put her down and she wakes right back up and the process starts all over again. I end up holding her the whole day with no time for anything else. I am also struggling to nurse her during the day when she's fussy. When she wants her milk, my letdown is not quick enough for her so I just end up pumping and give her the bottle. She seem to take it fine when she's drowsy or at nighttime.
Ky-An comes home at about 6p.m. and I am usually trying to put Ai-Vy to sleep in the room at this time. Then I took her out of the room at about 7p.m. so Hieu can give Ky-An a bath. If I am lucky then Ai-Vy will stay down and I can put Ky-An to sleep. Most days I am stll holding her or working with her and Hieu puts him to sleep so I end up not seeing Ky-An all day. It really suck because I miss him so much and the most I see him is in the weekend when Hieu's home to watch him. Then I can have a few stolen moments with my son after I get Ai-Vy to sleep or calm down.
I tell myself I need to wake up in the morning to spend some time with him before he goes to the babysitter's but Ai-Vy end up being fussy the night before or she wakes up every hour that I end up being tired and can't get up. I hate myself every morning when I wake up and he's gone. I can't even have him home with me in the morning anymore because Ai-Vy is so fuss that he ends up being ignored and I feel so bad. Don't get me wrong, I am enjoying the time with baby girl and love her to pieces. I just wish I get more time with my baby son also.
2 comments:
I am going through some of this now. I actually took a break from HCW. I am using the extra time to do the stuff that I need to be doing like doing basic housework (dishes, laundry, and meals) and being more available to the kids instead of trying to keep them entertained with activities to free me up for clipping or deal seeking. My quality of life has improved, sadly. I feel out of loop with my deals and couponing but happy to get caught up with the house, pictures, blogs, etc. It's so hard to find a good balance. It used to be where I was using downtime at work to keep up on deals, but lately I have no downtime at all so I'm behind on it all. Oh well, as they say. This too shall pass! Hang in there.
I hope things get better soon.
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